I recently discovered the blog Danimezza, who has this awesomely cool #aussiecurves outfit photo challenge of the week, specifically for us fierce bitches. And it’s part of an Australian blogroll. I get to be part of a BLOGROLL!! *squeals*
This week the theme is “secondhand”, and that’s kind of perfect for my maiden entry post because about 90% of my main wardrobe pieces are thrifted (Savers 4 lyf m/). But it also meant I had a really tough choice on my hands! In the end, I went with this shiny little number for 3 reasons:
This much bedazzlment across my chest makes me feel like one of my favouritest people-I-don’t-know-in-real-life, in the whole world: Leslie Hall. And what’s not to love about that?
Bitch needs to stop hogging all the awesome
(I stole that quote from a meme, but it’s true)
It’s one of my more recent purchases, and I haven’t worn it yet.
This dress SCARES me. Why? Because it’s moderately tight-fitting around the lower half. I usually wear fuller skirted clothes, because I am top heavy, and I “need” to balance out my upper half. I NEED to. Because that’s more FLATTERING for my figure. You know what? I flippin’ love this dress, it makes me happy, so FUCK FLATTERING.
For the majority of my life, i’ve been conforming to society’s conditioning of what is and isn’t acceptable to put on my already unacceptable body. What will make me look better, and what will make me look worse. I’ve gotten to the point where I both feel AND think that’s just ridiculous. I have a fat tummy. I have a fat tummy in the nude, in pants, in a victorian bustle dress, in a spacesuit, in a kaftan, in anything and everything I could possibly wear. I actually ain’t fooling no-one. And I actually don’t have to.
So. I wore this dress. I wore it all damn day. And you know what? Nobody said anything, nobody looked at me funny. In fact, the splits up the side were kind of higher than I realised when I sat down, so I think a few people were checkin’ out my damn fine thighs.
. . . . . . . . .
THE STORY OF “THE DRESS”
a picture book
a picture book
Shh… let’s just take all cleverly positioned photos, mostly with my back to the camera.
Alright, i’ll turn round. But MAN this is uncomfortable. It’s all CLINGY.
Oh my GAWD, it looks like i’m pregnant! What’ll I say if anyone asks?
How about “bitch please, it’s an iced coffee baby”?
Followed by “ooh, did someone say donuts?”
And so, in summary:
Some other “faux-pas” fashion goals for this year are to wear a pencil skirt, a wiggle dress, and *gasp* a CROP TOP.
Do you guys have a “scary” dress? What is it? Have you worn it?? Link me! 😀